Spankable

MistressTissa_Ass

Would you like to lay across my lap

as I pull down your boxers or panties

so you are fully exposed to me?

I instruct you to push your ass into the air, where

my lustful eyes

can gaze upon it

and where I have easy access

to administer

the most delicious spanking

to your hungry and eager bottom.

(And just maybe, if you’re good, I will fuck it)

mvb: pleasure doll

I had the pleasure of welcoming mvb into My Temenos for the first time.

After spending some time making this slut sexy for Me…

mistresstissa_mvb

(notice her panties through her negligee)

…I began the process of showing her how she should expect to be My pleasure doll…

…on the table…

mistresstissa_thatass

(look at that luscious ass)

…and on the floor…

mistresstissa_onherknees

 (where I dominated her physically before forcing her to rub her clit for Me)

To My delight, she is a eager and insatiable doll. Our three hours went by much too quickly.

A bit of what she wrote to Me the next day:

“Dear Mistress,

i’m still in a state of awe about yesterday. First and foremost, thank You. … Amazingly enough, yesterday was one of the first times i really actually loved myself. i go through a ton of self-frustration because i never quite feel “myself,” … It’s like walking around always feeling like i just don’t fit. Yesterday, i felt like i fit. It was incredible.”

-mvb

The continued training of slave m

Dear Mistress Tissa:

i would like to begin by saying “thank You” for another amazing session.   As is always the case, O/our sessions are equally intense and enjoyable for me.  This one was no different.  i hope that You were pleased and satisfied with the way i served You on this day.

Thank You for the time You spent prior to O/our session, checking in with me on my well-being both emotionally and physically.  It is very satisfying to know that i am the devoted slave of a dominatrix who is not only highly skilled and knowledgeable in BDSM, but also cares very much about Her subs’ emotional and physical well-being.  It is very comforting to know that i am in the capable hands of a such a sincere practitioner of Her vocation.

As previously stated, O/our most recent session was extremely intense and equally enjoyable, with two different scenarios that took place where You beat my ass with various types of instruments of discipline.  At various times You used Your powerful hands…

mistresstissa_spank

…two different new paddles that you were breaking in on me, (by the way, the wooden one stung the most), floggers, whips, and two wooden canes, were all harshly applied to my back, but mostly to my ass.

mistresstissa_redbottom

As is always the case it was an extremely enjoyable experience for me being at the complete mercy of a beautiful and skilled Dominatrix.  But, what made it so much more satisfying was the fact that You took the time to continue my training on effectively accepting and enjoying the beating that You were administering.  And, i cannot thank You enough for the lessons You have taught me on being a more receptive pain slut for You.  Instructing me on being more receptive to the discipline You administer by focusing on accepting each blow as more of a sensation, instead of “just pain,” has helped me to more fully enjoy these pleasurable experiences to the fullest.  i was better able to stay in the moment and focus on accepting Your discipline as a sensation to  be enjoyed, as opposed to pain that simply must be endured.  Even the final three blows you administered to my ass with the very large cane were manageable, but more importantly, exciting and enjoyable.   This was mainly due to the clear and purposeful suggestions You gave me on managing and accepting the intensity of the situation.  When You asked me if i could handle the final three intense blows that You were planning to administer, i knew that i could, because at that point i was well trained on accepting each blow as a sensation to be appreciated and savored.  Your expertise in Domination is unparalleled in my opinion and something that i truly admire.

I cannot thank You enough Mistress Tissa for teaching me how to better accept and enjoy the pain/pleasure that You administer to me during O/our sessions, and

for being so patient with me as You train me to be a better slave to You, and

for applying those amazing “healing hands” of Yours to my most sore areas during O/our recent session, and

for helping me to come to the realization that i truly love submitting to any pain that You inflict on me during O/our sessions because i derive tremendous pleasure from experiencing that sensation, but more importantly (to me) because  of the pleasure it affords You, and

for being  such a beautiful and amazing Goddess and allowing me the privilege of worshipping You as a “devoted slave”.

Sincerely,

slave m

slave m neglected to mention that the entire context of our session was about allowing one’s self to enter deep levels of submission through certain activities. We have been exploring sensation processing and how it relates to submission.

Also, slave m continues to be generous with his compliments. I don’t think My expertise in Domination is “unparalleled”, but I do consider Myself an expert in power dynamics/exchange and the psychology thereof.

For the record: The photo of his reddened bottom is only after I had spanked and paddled it. The other implements came after I took him off My lap.

Beating in Pittsburgh

MistressTissa_hotelbeating

This slut had the honor of being beat with one of the new toys I bought at the sex shop I visited in Columbus, OH.  I’m not quite sure what to call it. It feels like a Lexan cane but it’s wearing a padded sleeve. It’s great because the sleeve makes it thuddy instead of stingy. It’s quickly become one of My favorite toys.

Why I don’t do “feminization” as a form of humiliation

Many Dommes indicate “feminization” as an activity they offer. It’s popular. A lot of men are interested in it. Usually it’s cis men, but I have known trans men who enjoy it. Also, usually straight men, but sometimes queer, bi, or gay men, too. (I’m not talking about trans women. Trans women are women, not “men in dresses”.)

I enjoy and happily offer it to anyone who is interested. However, I don’t like to call it “feminization”, I prefer to call it “femme”*. Cultural implications aside, it sounds more elegant and, well, sexier.

Now, what I’ve noticed and find interesting about “feminization” is that it is usually fetishized and framed as an expression of humiliation.

Exactly how is it humiliating to be put in “women’s” clothing or lingerie?

If this were MaleDom I could understand this type of play, but FemDom? It makes no sense.

Why it’s even thought of as humiliating in the first place is because men are taught to feel emasculated by comparisons to women. So, if you dress like one? Well, shame on you. You’re not a real man; you’re a “sissy” and a “faggot”.

While I understand how this is erotic for some people, the basis for it is rooted in misogyny (and homophobia). You can’t be shamed for wearing something assigned to women unless there is something shameful about being a woman. So, when Dommes do this type of play, who are almost always femme themselves, it’s ironic.

Iggy_NoShame

(Photo: Mikael Jansson. Graphic: Have a Gay Day, Facebook group.)

If a submissive tells Me they like to be humiliated, I ask them in what ways. If they say they like to be “feminized”, I tell them I’m not the Domme for them. I don’t even want to PRETEND I think it’s humiliating. Why would I when it’s how I love to dress Myself? It seems that if I went along with even the fantasy that putting a man in “women’s” clothing is embarrassing or damaging I would be insulting Myself in the process. That doesn’t seem very Dominant to Me.

Why do I do it, then? Because putting men in beautiful panties, garter belts, stockings, heels, sexy dresses, and makeup is fun and sexy. I like to do it because I find it genuinely enjoyable. Why should only women enjoy silky or lacy lingerie?

Also, I love blending butch and femme together. Like the sexy Pavel Petel below:

leatherdaddyinlingerie

(https://pavel-petel.tumblr.com/)

So, if you come to Me and want to do femme play, My goal is to to offer a space in which you can be yourself, explore or develop your femme and/or feminine side, feel sexy, be treated like a “woman” (if that’s what you want to experience), and most of all to feel good and have fun — not to try to embarrass you for it.

*“Femme”, for those who don’t know, is a concept that originates from queer communities and its intent is to respect “gender” variance. It’s complement is “butch”. Unlike heteronormative culture, these terms acknowledge that people can have particular bodies and sexual identities and also have a so-called “non-congruent” gender presentation. This means you can have a penis, identify as a male, and be “femme”. Likewise, you have a vagina, identify as female, and be “butch”. This doesn’t inherently say anything about your sexuality. Anyone can be “femme”, “butch”, a combination of both, and/or something else. Using “femme” instead of “feminization”, for me, acknowledges this cultural value and separates the activity from its misogynistic associations.