Transformative BDSM with slave 70


Sure, I’m an excellent Domme for you hungry bottoms and respectful fetishists who need a scratch itched, or for Weekend Warrior Subs because they need a place to let go once in a while, but where I really excel is in the intellectual (often philosophical), psychological, and spiritual elements of play, and in seizing the potential for an intense and transformative experience that lies at the core of every BDSM interaction.

While not everyone is interested in, or equipped for, this level of play, slave 70 is clearly a good candidate.

Though we are still getting acquainted, he has shown himself to be willing to not only explore some luscious erotic space but to have me lead him into the often intimidating realm of self-improvement.

It seems from the brief time we have had together, both through a distance contract and in-person sessions, I have already left an indelible impression on him. From our last session he wrote:

“Thank You so much for an out of this world experience. I don’t usually sleep well, but last night I fell asleep early, and slept hard and long like a baby. Just a testament to what an intense afternoon it was.

I’ve been dealing with some personal issues… everyone does. These particular circumstances have really weighed me down in a way that has been all-encompassing — nothing much has been able to provide respite. But my time with You broke through; You made all my problems melt away. You kept me engaged and constantly on my toes, in such a way that my problems were the furthest thing from my mind. Thank You sincerely for that.

With each of the sessions I’ve had, You’ve challenged me in very personal ways, not just emotionally and physically but also intellectually. Yesterday was no exception, and was particularly challenging 🙂 That’s why I can say that my experiences with You are unique and are an order of magnitude different from any experiences I’ve have with others. Simply put, Your attention, focus, energy and spirit all exist on a much higher level. My gratitude for the physical predicaments and the cognitive challenges; In addition to taking home the marks You put on Your property, I also took home several things to think about.”

slave 70

Welcoming T and FC to Temenos

I recently had the pleasure of a scene with T and FC, a lovely couple from out of state.

T initially approached me wanting to gift a scene to her partner, FC, while also having an interest in improving her skills and confidence assuming the Dominant role as she may desire in their relationship.

After speaking with them both, I crafted something that I felt would fit their experience level and meet their needs, both individually but also as a couple.

They both wrote me afterward.

From T:

"Thank you for an incredible experience. The thought and care you put into the session was evident. Any nerves or discomfort I initially felt melted away within moments thanks to your clever positioning and language choice as you started the scene. I loved the [implement] and hadn’t thought about that as a possibility. I loved watching the way you crafted the scene and the punishments delivered. Absolutely no issues came up, in fact quite the opposite ;). It was great to learn that FC can take a LOT of pain (he might be a pain slut after all). Thank you thank you for this rich addition to our relationship." 

From FC:

Dear Mistress Tissa,

Thank you for your creative and insightful treatment. Not a single experience was unpleasant from my perspective.

You incorporated T into the experience in a way that I think fostered more open communication and a stronger bond. We are now able to explore topics that would have been delicate before our time with you, and when I close my eyes, I still clearly see scenes from those amazing hours. 

From your choice of clothing to the type of "punishment" delivered, my fantasies came true and then some.

Unfortunately, I recovered quickly, and there were no lasting marks, but the memories will stick. I loved the method of priming before the [activities], and I loved being stretched out on the table. Having to [activity] was demeaning in a fun way, as was the [another activity]. Being ordered to [yet another activity] was an expert move. 

I thought [you] did a wonderful job with how to incorporate both of us.

It would be a joy to have another session sometime. ... Thank you again for a magical day.

Thank you for being so hot to play with! I had a wonderful time with you both. I hope to see you again in the future!

Mistress Tissa

Welcoming Loso to Temenos

Loso recently came for his first session with me. This is what he wrote to me afterward (edited slightly for privacy):

After reflecting on our session I was impressed with the entire experience from the pre-session communication to the execution of the activities during the session. You made me feel very comfortable when I arrived, and I felt like I was able to be very open with you about my likes and dislikes. That is very important, because at no point there was pressure for me to feel like I had to do something I was uncomfortable with. At the beginning of our session I was a bit tense and in my own head. You noticed this right away, and you made sure to make me feel relaxed and put me in a headspace where I could fully let go. … This is all a credit to you and your experience on how to guide someone to having the right mindset while serving you. Also, you were very caring for marks that were made throughout the session and made sure to clean/treat them properly. There were a lot of favorite activities I can pull from our time together, but I will try to name a few. When I was on the cross there was silence in the room and the only sounds were the impact of your flogger and smacks. This was the moment I truly let go and felt like I was no longer thinking, but instead reacting. The next activity was when I was on your table … There were a lot of sensations being played with at this point, and I loved the feeling of how vulnerable I felt. The last thing was [the predicament]. During this part I felt like I had to work for something, and the challenge I was presented with created a unique sensation on the mind and body. All in all it was an amazing session, and I hope I can be granted the opportunity to serve you again.

Also, he sent me this fantastic silicone gag from my wishlist:

Thank you, Loso! I’m glad we were able to have this hot and memorable experience together. You’re welcome back whenever you’re ready.

Know Your Limits

When you approach me for a scene please make sure that you can tell me your limits, not just your interests. Lately, I have noticed more people are not prepared and don’t know what theirs are. They’re approaching me for a session and have sometimes no idea about what they’re not okay with.

For my play-style, this is a problem. Your limits are actually more important than your interests as they tell me important boundaries that I cannot cross. This is essential for me to know so I, you know, don’t cross them.

What’s happening is that during the scene consultation I start asking about limits and I’m getting “I’m not sure” or “I don’t know” kind of answers. Then I’m spending valuable time asking if this or that is okay when I should be spending it on other things. The consultation is not the place for me to help you figure out your own rules but to ask you clarifying questions about them, if needed. Figuring things out can take a lot of time and will quickly eat up the call.

If you’re not aware, there are (at least) two categories of limits: “hard” and “soft”. Everyone seems to be in agreement that “hard” are things that are completely off the table, but “soft” has some confusion. I see most people define it as “things you don’t really like doing but will do if the Mistress wants to do them”. I don’t think that definition makes sense as you are not telling me a limit but a preference. A limit is a boundary. There is no boundary in that you don’t really like wax play but will do it if I like it. So, I define “soft” as something that falls between being completely OKAY or completely NOT OKAY.

In short:

HARD limit: done under NO conditions.
SOFT limit: done under CERTAIN conditions.

For example:

If femme play (aka “feminization”) was a hard limit it means you’re not okay with any kind of femme play. There are no conditions by which you’re willing to do anything femme related.

If femme had a soft limit, it means you have specific conditions around it. It could be that you’re only okay with panties OR panties and stockings OR everything but makeup, etc.

If femme play has no limits, then you’re okay with anything femme related.

I realize that new players may honestly not yet know their limits. I get that. However, you still should have some idea of what you are absolutely not interested in incorporating into a scene, or even what kinds of things you’d be okay with as much as you can imagine having them done to you.

I have hard new players say things like, “Mistress, I’ve never done bondage before. I think I’d be okay if you tied my wrists or ankles down but I’m not sure about both yet.” You have just given me a soft limit.

If you’re having a difficult time coming up with your list a good place to start is my interests page. Go through the things I have listed there and add anything that you would not want in a scene to your hard limits or things that you have particular requirements about to your soft limits. Don’t worry about being afraid that you don’t get it right or that you end up wanting or not wanting to do something. You can change your limits at any time. But you should have this ready when you ask to play with someone. All good players — tops and bottoms — should be familiar with their partner’s limits.

If you would like personalized help I recommend scheduling a coaching call with me before you ask for a scene. I can go through a variety of things with you and we can hone in on your boundaries. I’m very good at this so you can feel confident that you will learn something about yourself during our call.

So, again, PLEASE BE PREPARED!

Now that you’re immobilized…

It’s time for…

nipple torment? Of course there are removable panels for my enjoyment…

CBT? I have a three-way zipper for perfect access (monkey dick said he loved feeling exposed while immobilized and helpless to my torture)

more layers of bondage? After I pull the cord tightly, cinching the sack around you I can add straps, cords, chains, and more…

me Dominating helpless you with my beautiful feet? I can trample you, give you some playful kicks, and add or remove a hood if I want to deny or allow you the privilege of feeling my toes and soles on your face…

a nap? This is wonderfully supple leatherette with an interior that feels like soft suede. (slave john said the sack is “very comfortable” and that he “could be in it for a while”)

I have more ideas but I’ll leave those for my next victim lucky submissive. 😉

What would you want done to you? Comment with your favorites…

Mistress Tissa’s Dix Flags

Welcome, thrill-seekers!

Step right up into my sleep sack, where I will fully strap you in so you can’t move a muscle (for safety reasons, of course)…

…but I’ll leave your tiny dick out so I can hurt it. And the thrill is — there is nothing you can do about it!

A very popular attraction is our very own “The Iron Mistress”:

Sometimes, at Dix Flags, “accidents” happen…

Now it’s time for your balls to take a spin on the Rubber Flogger! Fast, slow, hard, or soft — you never know what’s next!

Our last stop is the whirling tails of the Double Devil! Ouch, that’s gotta hurt!

Come back and offer your body up to be my amusement park again soon!