My Fetishes VI: Diaphanous Clothing

I realized I hadn’t added a post about my own fetishes in almost 3 years !!

Diaphanous means sheer, see-through, and I find it both arousing to see others wear this kind of clothing and also wear it myself.

I find it erotic for a variety of reasons. One, it appeals to voyeurist/exhibitionist desires. Two, I find that it’s often more erotic than a fully nude person because you’re being granted visual access — but not complete access; like a tease. Three, you’re not really supposed to see through clothing, are you? So is it an accident? Am I not supposed to look?

Here are some images I find sexy:

(c) Hayley’s Secrets
(c) unknown
(c) Steven Meisel for Vogue Magazine
(c) unknown
(c) unknown. Some paparazzi guy.
(c) MrMarshallMan

(It’s difficult to find sexy photos of men in see-through clothing !)

My Fetishes V: Smoking

I have a fetish for smoking, also called “capnolagnia“. (Not to be confused with coprolagnia, which is the fetish for feces.) I have had this fetish for a long time. Possibly since I was a child, though I didn’t first try a cigarette until I was a teenager.

I remember seeing this photo of Madonna when I was in high school and being very drawn to it. I found it and Her so incredibly sexy. I saw Myself in Her. This blend of feminine and masculine energy. Maybe a bit of the Leather Daddy, too. 😉

Madonna_smoking

(photo: Herb Ritts)

So why don’t I offer smoking play?

I stopped smoking! (My last cigarette was in November of 2011.)

At that time, it felt like something I wanted to do. I had smoked on and off for 18 years and My body would let Me know it wasn’t happy by getting sick. A doctor told Me I was a prime candidate for more serious problems. I already knew this.

For the most part, I really enjoyed it, though.

…positioning one between two fingers, bringing it to slightly parted lips, the flick of the match or lighter while pulling in that first drag, a French inhale (so sexy), then rings, a perfect accompaniment to coffee and conversation…

I do miss that. But My body is happier without them.

I have considered vaping in sessions, but I’m not sure it would have the same effect. Also, from what I’ve read, they are not any less safe — if not worse.

If only someone would make a safe cigarette…

Human Nature

Society tends to view people like Me as things to be criminalized and eradicated. Likewise with others whose livelihood involves eroticism or sex. When people like them are faced with some aspect they do not like about themselves, such as an interest in being tied down and flogged, people like Me who joyously do these things (consensually, of course), become scapegoats for their repressed sexuality.

One reason why I do what I do is because I am genuinely passionate about people expressing who they really are. I am especially interested in matters of identity, sexuality (especially kink), and intimacy. All of which are conscious elements of how I approach and practice BDSM.

Sadly, our world attempts to define and control these things from the moment we are born. We are color-coded and assigned roles and expectations about how we dress, behave, have sex–and with whom. We are told what is okay and what is not. And when we don’t fit into those boxes and express our true nature, we are often shamed.

I don’t think most people fall neatly into “woman” or “man” or “straight” or “gay”. I don’t even think most people are strictly “vanilla”. Identity and sexuality are far more interesting and nuanced than what we are lead to believe. Challenging and experimenting with what we have been taught about them can be very exciting, gratifying, and liberating.

I am here to provide a safe space for you to explore these things that you may feel afraid to express. I am here to usher you into a new awareness of yourself.